Well those of you that know me know that I don't party often but when I do....... Anyway my girlfriend and I got invited to a costume party being thrown by one of her coworkers with a post apocalyptic theme. Now let me tell you these dudes go all out when they throw a costume party. When we arrived it seriously looked like a scene straight out of Madd Maxx or Water World I kid you not. Dudes had metal helmets and armor they made themselves, staffs with real alligator claws on them and the host had a deer skull mounted on his shoulder, one chick had on an outfit made completely from inner tube rubber and I don't even know how to describe most of the other outfits.

But before we get into all of that I have to tell you guys about our stop at the liquor store on the way to the party. Now Lauren and I went as post apocalyptic warrior zombies or some shit like that. Basically I dug out a bunch of my old Marine Corps cammo and cut it all up with my knife so it looked ragged and worn (and yes of course I de-sleeved my vest, can't have a Marine without guns right?) and I actually made Lauren a quite revealing mini-skirt, matching leggings and a top out of my old cammo stuff and a few things we picked up at a salvation army (which she looked hot as hell in btw). And our faces were painted with darkened eyes so we looked somewhat dead or whatever.

Anyway, on our way into the ghetto liquor store some drunk mistakes me first for someone in the national guard (which almost got him a beat down) and then for an active duty Marine (mind you I have chains wrapped around me and I'm wearing a "boonie hat" from back in the "nam" era. But old boy has to shake my hand and thank me for my service (which was cool) but he also wants to know if my arms are "real" lol. And of course once in the store Lauren and I are getting tons of stares, until one dude comments loudly that "You two must be going to one hell of a party!" lol.

So we arrive at the party and these guys have gone all out. First there is a wheel made from iron that all new arrivals must spin and suffer the consequences of whatever your spin lands on. I lost one of my boots and later on had to leap the bonfire in order to earn it back. Lauren immediately became someone's drink slave for the night. Other possible outcomes were to drink such tantalizing beverages as "mutagen" and the like or entertain the crowd which for women often meant getting up on a small stage and doing some kind of slutty dance and emphasizing their cleavage to the delight of the crowd.

I ended up polishing off a couple pints of vodka and evidently revealing a bit too much of our sex life to some of Lauren's female co-workers which I only partially remember doing. Fortunately Lauren was at least as equally hammered and didn't seem to mind.

I still want to choke one of her co-workers for bringing me a "pickle juice shot". Now drunk, sober or whatever I f*%&#ng hate pickle juice or anything similar. It is just one of those flavors that instantly turns my stomach. Well I guess this was pickle juice and tequila and looked to be like a triple shot or something along those lines but as soon as I gulped it down and that strong pickle juice flavor hit me it came back up like Godzilla torching Japan! I spewed it all over the back lawn and even now several days later I cant get that horrid taste completely out of my mind.

All in all we had a great time and I'm still finding out a few things that I did that I don't fully recall lol. If I am able to get a hold of some of the pics from the party I'll post them here, you guys have to see it to believe it!

Good times!,
Matt Kroczaleski