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|12/12/2014 5:33:11 PM - Andy M
I just wanted to let you know that I am sending good thoughts your way. I know it may be kinda lame, but I am a big believer in the idea that positive ripples that we send out will one day come back to help us out. So I wanted you to know that I have been reading your log consistently for awhile now. You are always someone that I can count on to post things past just the bare bones reps and sets of your training program. As a reader of the site, it is very cool to see past the numbers and the motivations behind the people that we look up to. I know you're going through a lot of tough shit right now, and it utterly sucks how bad things can happen to good people. But stay strong my man, your impact has gone way beyond anything that you can see or that you realize. The ripples that you have caused have touched countless people lives, like me, and in turn, we try to have a positive impact on others like you have had on us (even if we have never actually met). At the end of the day, it all starts with you. People out there are sending good vibes your way in hopes to keep you strong even as your are struggling at times. I believe that true strength is shown forth when you take the small steps forward when the world seems to be sending everything it has to try and stop you. Keep taking those small steps forward Clint, and soon enough, you will see it pay off.
I have held onto this for a few weeks now, not knowing what to say in reply. I will start with one of the few things that I know how to say, "Thank You".
For starters, I can not put into words how I feel physically or emotionally. I can say that I'm "drained" both mentally and physically and I'm really just "tired" of everything. I'm ready for a change, a better life.
There is a lot that I have inside to say but I am just not ready to put it out there yet. Not sure when I will be. A lot of anger (towards direct people, the actions of others, the entire situation) and a lot of other emotions that I'm trying not to feel.
I will say this, my situation is not much different than yours. We all have our circumstances. Bills, school, family, marriage, work. We each have our own struggles and they are equally difficult. Nothing separates them.
I'm taking my second dose of chemo for the day and headed to bed, brother. Keep in touch.
One More Day,
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