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12/24/2012 3:38:00 PM -
Dealing with THEM

I’ve written about this topic before, but I’d like to explore it in more detail today because the holidays are off to a bit of a weird start for me. I’ll preface this by saying that I’m not complaining—not even a little bit. I’m doing well, and these aren’t real problems. It’s more of a series of little annoyances, and I’m trying to figure out how to not let it get me knocked off-track, mentally and with training.

In other words, it’s business and family shit, just like it is for pretty much everyone else.

I think sometimes you just have to wake up one morning and say to yourself, “It’s not me. It’s THEM.”

People generally don’t like to hear the truth. They also don’t want to be called on their bullshit. When you do both of these things at the same time, it won’t go over well. What happens at that point is that the people you’re calling out will attempt to make it seem like YOU’RE the one with the problem. You’ll be called on to both accept a load of crap, AND to apologize for the thing they’re trying to convince you that you did wrong.

This strategy goes for everything—for life, for family crap, for business, for coaching, and for training. You’ll get this from people wherever you go, and whatever you do, and it’ll put you in a serious funk if you allow it to go on ad nauseum. That’s what most of us do, because we don’t want to rock the boat, we don’t want to burn bridges, and we don’t want to shake up the status quo. We’re smart enough to appreciate the fact that we don’t want to lose things—to lose whatever progress we’ve made—so we’ll just grin and bear it, figuring things will settle down eventually.

Maybe I’m projecting here. I don’t know if most of you do that or not, but I’m assuming you do it, because that’s what I do. When people around me act in an irrational manner, and I’m sure THEY’RE being irrational as opposed to me being that way, I tend to keep my mouth shut and wait it out. The problem with that, however, is that if it happens for long enough—and if it happens over and over again—you’ll think YOU’RE the one who’s doing something wrong. And if you’re associating with the wrong people, they’ll try to convince you of this.

You know how you deal with all of this? Experience.

If you live long enough, and you’re in these situations long enough, you’ll know when you’re right and when you’re wrong, and you’ll know how to react accordingly. You’ll know when other people are being irrational, or they’re incompetent, or they’re simply letting their ego get in the way of logical behavior. You’ll be able to see it coming a mile away, and one day, you’ll wake up and know that it’s THEM. THEY’RE the one with the problem, not you.

That’s something you should take into account when people tell you that you’re doing the wrong thing, because if you’ve set goals, and you know where you’re going, and you’re doing all the right things to get yourself there, there’s a chance that everyone else could be wrong—and that despite what everyone says, you’re the one who might be right.

Happens all the time.

Angry Coach

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