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4/4/2013 11:04:26 PM -
Another industry tirade

People in the fitness industry take themselves way too f****g seriously. Most of these guys, if you read their websites and look at their Facebook posts, actually think they’re role models we should be emulating. Some of them have actually even published lifestyle and time management books. I find this very curious, considering I know most of them have never held a job outside of the fitness industry—which, and I don’t care who I piss off here, is fairly important experience to have if you’re planning on giving advice to the general public about how to manage their lives.

Aside from the crossed-arms pose, however, the next thing I think you need to watch out for is hyperbole when it comes to the language these guys use on their websites. The second entry in the definition for hyperbole is, “an extravagant statement or figure of speech not intended to be taken literally, as ‘to wait an eternity.’”

This is perfect for this industry. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, check out one of these “Top 50 Names in Fitness” lists on someone’s blog, then read the bios of some of the people on the list.

Honestly, again, I don’t really care what these people do—at least until they start putting out bullshit information that’s going to mislead people, AND when they blatantly steal other people’s shit and try to make money off it. That’s a f-ing epidemic in this industry, and it’s sad.

When you read these bios, take a look at the language—and the egos on these guys. They’re a perfect example of overcompensation for being the little bitch of a kid who used to get shoved into urinals and never played a sport. They compensate by being complete and utter narcissists who think they’re owed something by the world—which is why they turn around and steal shit from people who’ve actually put in the work.

I could name names, here, but I think we all know exactly who we’re talking about (nobody who’s ever been on this site, incidentally). The one thing you have to watch out for is the guy who claims he’s living his whole life to help YOU. They all say the same shit:

“For years, I tried every program and diet, and nothing worked. That began my QUEST. For the past decade, I have devoted my LIFE to advancing the field of human performance. I have devoted every waking hour to finding the SECRET to athletic performance, and now I have devoted my LIFE to bringing it to you.”

Really, “bro”?

I’ve devoted MY life to pouring beer and whiskey down my throat, getting laid, and not being a cocksmoking douchebag to my friends and family, so how come I’m stronger than you, faster than you, can run you into the ground, AND beat the living f**k out of you?

Hmmmm.

I don’t know, man. I’ve been on the warpath against this shit for a long, long time, because I had the rare “privilege” of taking a look at the disgusting interior of this business, and honestly, I’ll pass on being involved with any of these anuses, and so should anybody else who has a f-ing clue. I mean, Dave just had a full hip replacement, and he’s already squatting a wet dream for most of these clowns a month later. Like I’ve said, it’s sad who’s looked at as an “authority” by the public these days. This is just one of those industries where the “experts” are chosen by people who don’t know the first damned thing about the subject matter—and it all goes to their heads.

And the next thing you know, you’re watching videos with some dude who basically has a camera up his nose, and he’s telling you to quit your job, be a vegan, and oh yeah...buy his protein and his piece of shit eBook and his monthly “coaching.”

Good luck to you if you fall for any of this shit. Seriously.




,
Angry Coach


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